On Saturday night I met up with some friends at a local bar. I chatted with a friend for awhile about my pregnancy, some of my fears, and also on why I don't want to tell everyone I know quite yet about this pregnancy. My friend then informs me about how a mutual friend is also pregnant right now and is the same number of weeks as I am. I have no good reason for why hearing that brought tears to my eyes, but it did. I know plenty of babyloss moms right now that are pregnant and I am excited for them all, but yet hearing that this girl is pregnant really got to me. All I could think was, oh great, another friend that is pregnant at the same time as me, that last time I was pregnant at the same time as another friend, friends actually, she got to bring her happy, healthy baby home and I didn't. Such a shitty thought. I can't believe that it bothered me in that way. I even had to go to the bathroom and let out a short cry. So pathetic. Of course I am happy for her and want things to turn out. I guess I am just so afraid of things going bad again and having everyone around me keep getting pregnant so easily and have everything work out, while I sit here babyless. Guess I am not as optimistic as I thought.
On a whole other topic though, Dereck and I finished the closets in the nursery. That was the one thing we never touched when we remodeled the nursery this past spring. Now it is finished with tons of shelving and spots for hanging clothes. Now I just need stuff to hang up and place on the shelves and the baby.