The results for the MOMS study were published yesterday in the New England Journal of Medicine. Even before we did the surgery and had heard that the study had ended early do to efficacy it was so nice to be able to read all of the results and know that so many lives were changed because of it. Although my son wasn't part of the study and had to pass away, he still had Spina Bifida and still had the surgery, and that will always be a huge part of my life. I look at so many of the blogs wrote by mothers that have gone through the fetal surgery like Liam and cry every time I read them. I am so happy for all of those families whose lives were changed because of the surgery and that there babies are accomplishing so much more than they would have if it wasn't for the surgery, but so sad that I can't share in there joy the way I would have liked. I still look back and wonder if Liam would still be with me if I hadn't done the fetal surgery that day. I guess I'll never know, but seeing those MOMS study results helps me to believe that we did everything we could do for him to help him have a better life.
I also had learned that the state of California had passed the law that I could get a Certificate of Still Birth. I know it is not a regular certificate of birth, but it means the world to me knowing it is recognized that he was still born.