Thursday, May 5, 2011

Sweet Liam,
I had to write you again. I am missing you so much right now. I should probably just go to bed but can't stop thinking about Mothers Day. I mean how can I not when there is stuff pertaining to it everywhere I look, and I am not just talking about the flowers, cards, and other gifts that will be given to mothers and grandmothers. I am including in that all of the mothers that I see with there little ones and even the pregnant ones, all of these mothers that will actually have there baby with them on Mothers Day. I know I am a mother, and people keep telling me like I need to be reminded, but it really just sucks that you can't be here. I wouldn't have cared about getting a Mothers Day card or flowers, not that it wouldn't have been nice to have been thought of, but just having you and your father, our family, together would have been enough to make that day super special.
Now I sit and wonder if anyone will even think about me and you on Mothers Day. Would I get a card saying "Happy First Mothers Day". I would love it if someone thought of me and you to send a card, but would it really be a "Happy First Mothers Day." I feel like I struggle with this. I want people to recognize and remember that you are my son and I am your mother, but I've seen the cards they sell for Mothers Day, and well, are any of them really fitting for someone whose baby has died? Although like I said, it would still nice to be thought of, even if its just a phone call to see how I am coping. Maybe I'll just buy some flowers for us on Saturday or have some delivered to the house on Mothers Day. I'd like to at least have some fresh flowers around.
I wonder what they have planned for you guys in heaven to do on Mothers Day. Maybe you can make something special for another mommy that had to leave her little one too soon and go to heaven.
I love you sweetheart
Love Always, Mom


  1. I will certainly be thinking of you on Mother's Day... and absolutely believe that you are Liam's loving and special mum forever. Your love for him sings out from your words and is part of what makes you such a wonderful mum xoxo

  2. My girlfriend who is a neighbor wished me Happy Mother's Day yesterday. She gets it as she lost a boy at 23 weeks. Just her small acknowledgement meant so much to me and I thanked her for remembering.

  3. This letter made me cry. This is such a sweet letter to your son. I know how you're feeling. Our sons are watching over us on Mother's Day, though. I know that it's not the same as having them here, but one day, we'll be reunited with them.

    By the way, I'm sure he loved your letter. Thinking about you and praying for you *hugs*

  4. Dear Becky,

    My name is Susan. I was the token Grandma on the SB site for a time.My daughters little girl died at three months old from liver failure.
    I understand many things you are saying.
    I wanted to talk about our Riley all the time.NOBODY else did or would. I was desperate to keep her in our lives. As time went by I felt like she was slipping further and further away. It has been a year and a half since she passed away and our family is finding our way. We talk about her all the time. We have a Riley tree in the back yard, that I have turned into a park. My daughter got pregnant right away. We brought her baby home from the hospital last Dec. on Rileys angel day.
    I thought I would be too sad about Riley to accept Peyton. (They look just alike) It wasn't bitter sweet at all....just sweet. I feel like everything I do for Peyton, that Riley knows I would have done for her.
    I want to tell you what I said to someone on the SB site today.
    This is your darkest time. But there is a light starting to shine in. It will get brighter and in time it will fill your life with hope and that light will be called
    Your son's spirit is all around you. Remember this, as you find a way to weave this new reality into your life.
    Your son is very handsome. He loves you Momma!

  5. I am really sorry for you loss, your swwt little Angel is now in Heaven. May he be safe sound & happy. Released from his ties and looking down on you both.


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